Birthday Feels : On Being 25, The Most Intentional Year Yet.


A little over a week ago, I turned 26 years old. And yet, I still feel like I heard my friends chanting happy birthday to me when I turned 21, just yesterday. How the hell did 5 years go by, so fast?

I never thought I’d be one of those people that would romanticize my age though, especially as I am older now, but here I am, feeling older, but wiser. And certainly blessed. It’s almost hard to believe that I am halfway through to 50 years on earth. Whoa.

At this point, I think it would be perfect to hit the pause button, sit back, and reflect on what I may call my most intentional year so far…

Acknowledgement : Old age is scary. Infact, I feel like the pressure rising everyday as I wake up. However, one of the best things and greatest gifts of all time, in my opinion, is the grace to live and be able to celebrate getting older, no matter what circumstances you’re facing in your life.

Lessons Learned From Living More Intentionally:

Time is passing by so fast. So no matter what you do, make the most it :

I’ve finally come to realize that time is my most priceless possession, and making the most of it is probably the best thing I should do with it. Reading this website link helped me get my time perspective in order.

There is real power in having “weak ties” and leaving behind (or at least deviating from) the familiarity of close/strong ties.

Weak ties force you to leave your comfort zone. They are more likely to help you achieve your potential by pushing you to be your best self.

I once read a book where a psychologist talked about how she was suffering what she called the “twentysomething crisis“. She found herself constantly in the same cycle of doing nothing particularly productive with her “close ties” or urban tribe. She was mainly always grabbing a drink and complaining about how the job markets were weak and are not as favorable as before. This went on and on and soon she found that there was nothing new in her life; no new challenges, job learning opportunities, etc. Thankfully, social media opened up her mind. She connected a lot with people over social media and learned from the people she was ‘connected with’. Eventually, she reached out to a Facebook friend on learning about a job offer and this friend put in a good word for her and she got a new job, and soon, she became a director at a new firm.

Her life changed because of this weak tie.

More on this coming on a new blog post.

Being Good At What You DO, Actually Pays Off :

I always drum these words into my head – to try to make it easier for people to help me, or to refer me easily, to whatever it is I can get my hands on. Whatever we try our hands at, we should always try to be the best we can be. In other words, whatever is worth doing, is worth doing well. Whether it’s in school work, jobs, art work, etc.- Putting in your best produces better results and makes it easier for people to recommend us better than if we did a mediocre job. Mediocrity is overrated. Who wants to suck, anyway?

the ash tree journal

Related Posts :

Self-compassion is necessary.

I think one of the most important lessons I have learned this year is this: compassion. This is being kind to yourself. Not letting the inner critic in.

Self-compassion is saying to myself : I fucked up big time, but I won’t let this define me and I won’t beat myself up about it. In the past year, most especially in the past three months, I have been forced to be self-compassionate in order to survive in this crazy world of ups & downs. This was, and still is a time which is both extremely exciting and scary. So learning how to be nice, and staying kind to myself when things don’t go as planned, has helped me to stay grounded.

I do this by approaching life with love, kindness and mindfulness.

Intentions Matter :

A friend once used to drum these words into my ear. “Whatever you do, do it with intention”. I always wondered what that meant but as I did some more reflecting, I realised that I may have done things and acted in so many ways without intention but I know now, that is is imperative that everything we do matters. No lie, it did take a lot of life altering experiences to realise that living with intent was important.

How do I get it done?

I have refused to settle anymore: in academics, my relationships with people and finances.

the ash tree journal

I learnt I am still learning to be vulnerable by putting myself out there, pursuing my passions, and over time, I found that it was one of the most rewarding feelings ever. Of course, with vulnerability comes the fear of rejection. I have learned to push that fear aside and I’d rather be open about what I want and get rejected than not even try at all, you know what I mean?

Read : BIRTHDAY GRATITUDE – 24 Years In The Making! 



Never be afraid to create the life you truly deserve. Dream big. Dream bigger.

As Oprah said : you have to find what sparks a light in you, so that you, in your own way, can illuminate the world.

Join The Conversation…

Thanksgiving : A Pretty Long List Of All The Things I’m Thankful For In Life

Thanksgiving day is this week and while I can’t say I have had the best November, it’s always imperative to stay positive and remain grateful through anything and everything.

Without further chit chat, here are all of the things I’m thankful for, this year!

Read last years’ post here : The things I’m thankful for, right now

I AM :

  • Thankful for birthdays and new beginnings.
  • Thankful for scars and the stories that come with them.
  • Thankful for the changing seasons, which reminds me that truly, nothing is permanent.
  • Thankful for death and lessons that we only live once, and life can end in an instant- sometimes you don’t even get the chance to prepare for your end.
  • Thankful for all the failures, they make us appreciate our accomplishments.
  • Thankful for time and its ability to slowly heal all wounds.
  • Thankful for hands that work, create and recreate.
  • Thankful for a sound mind that always finds a way to stay calm amidst all the pressure.
  • Thankful for great friends that are always ready to chat and have some wine, but still know when to leave you alone.
  • Thankful for people who show you that you really CANNOT trust everyone.
  • Thankful for sunsets, because it shows us that even endings can be beautiful.
  • Thankful for chances. Chances to turn our life around, once we get them.
  • Thankful for God, and his unending love and favor.
  • Thankful for the best parents and siblings ever.
  • Thankful for a sweet and amazing future husband who makes me feel warm, inside and out, everyday.
  • Thankful for the occasional poverty life hits me with, it reminds me to stay humble.
  • Thankful for the spirit of contentment.
  • Thankful for protection. God’s protection.
  • Thankful for school, and the occasional stress, it reminds me that I have a role to play in life now, and someday in the near future.
  • Thankful for Netflix, for times when I want to drown myself with movies and entertainment.
  • Thankful for Spotify, for keeping me company and producing amazing playlists!
  • Thankful for beautiful artistes that are always sharing their work.
  • Thankful for fellow blogger friends and support groups that keep you motivated in this blogging world.
  • Thankful for amazing readers and people who always leave thoughtful comments behind. ❤️

What are you thankful for? Let’s have a chat in the comments section

BIRTHDAY GRATITUDE – 24 Years In The Making! 

If you know me very well, you’ll know I’m super obsessed with my birthday! There’s just this awesome magic that comes with adding a year to my life. Its like, suddenly, all the problems of my previous years are gone, once it’s my birthday.

This birthday, which was on the 27th April, was a very special one for me because, not only have I terribly grown out of a lot of habits, I have also learned to consider something more and more important everyday : Gratitude.

As I wake up each day from this new year, I have challenged myself to experience the power of real gratitude and the benefits that come with it.

And with that said I’m just going to talk about the 3 simple things I’m incredibly grateful for, right now.

1. I am grateful for a mother who wished me a happy birthday starting two days before my birthday. For her kind and true words of advice for the new year coming. I’m grateful for a Father who has been a constant support, the most loving man I have ever met and the greatest teacher of all. I’m grateful for amazing parents who, from a distance, can make you feel like the kilometers are just numbers.


2. For friends who, despite the distance and life events, still stuck close. And made my birthday weekend an amazing one!

3. For life lessons. Because, experience is the best teacher, right?


I’m also trying to do this thing where I’ll try as much as possible to keep my blog posts short and simple. Hence, my condensed words, haha!

To everyone who made this birthday special in one way or the other, thank you! I have come to realize that I have a big support system and I’m grateful to each and everyone who has also been a big support to The Ash Tree Journal and her Mama- me!






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